Dear Millennial Parents. From a Millennial Teacher.

As my fourth year of teaching is coming to a close, I find myself reflecting upon what I have learned in my career and the experiences I have had, both good and bad. I have had many thought-provoking experiences, followed by ongoing, stimulating conversations with my colleagues. Through these reflections and conversations, I have concluded that there are many things that affect student success, both in the classroom and in the real world. I know that as an educator, it is my job to create lifelong learners, as well as help to shape citizens in our world. But as any educator knows- we can’t do it alone. “It takes a village,” as they say. In an ideal classroom, the parent, the teacher, and the student would work together as a team for the success of the student. But as life goes on, this is becoming more and more rare. Teachers seem to keep getting more and more responsibility put on them when it comes to what they “need to” or “should be” teaching kids; things that used to come from home, or observing adults in their everyday environment. With millennials being so reliant and dependent on technology, it appears that the younger children are seeing more and more things portrayed to them through a screen, and not enough through human interaction, which is causing problems. Although this is my opinion, I know educators would agree with me when I say that it is causing problems that didn’t used to be as much of an issue. It causes problems that parents may not even be aware of. But as an educator who sees so many different students with different home lives, socioeconomic status, upbringings, religions, morals, etc., I have created my own theory. I understand that some parents, especially millennials, may not get it. They may not be able to see the effects that their decisions are having on their child. So- I have composed a list of advice for millennial parents, of small things to do that could have a HUGE impact on the success of their child, which I will keep short and sweet.

BE PRESENT. Your child is hungry for your love and attention. I see so many times that kids act out and have behavioral issues because they want attention- even if it’s negative attention! Spend quality time with your child each night, even if it’s a 30 minute block of uninterrupted time where you give them your undivided attention so they feel that they are important to you.

LET YOUR CHILD STRUGGLE. Oh. My. Lanta. I can’t stress this one enough!! There are so many children today that can’t problem solve on their own; they are used to an adult constantly helping them do ev-er-y-thing! I’m not saying to neglect your child and make them fend for themselves; but helping your child do something that they are capable of is enabling them to be helpless. Think about yourself for a minute. Is there something that you, as an adult, had to learn to do all on your own, using your resources? I’ve had countless situations where I have either learned something the hard way, or I’ve used tools and resources to find how to do something, and guess what? I learned from it and now I know! Your child is no different. There are certain things in life when it is OKAY to let your child struggle. Theorists and researchers have proven that children who construct new knowledge on their own, by learning through challenges, often leads to greater success. I’m sure it’s often easier to just help them with something, and it’s not enjoyable to watch them struggle; but in the long-term, you are doing them a favor by letting them feel empowered by learning and being successful on their own!

SPONGES. Your child is a sponge. They soak up every single thing that is seen, heard, or portrayed in your home and in your environment. Sure- they may not understand half of the innuendos or jokes or words that they are being subjected to, but I guarantee that will not stop them from using it in the classroom. As a millennial myself, I totally understand “self care” and “me time.” Trust me- I love watching trashy reality TV and listening to music that you wouldn’t hear at the Christian Book Store. However, I don’t have kids; I’m only subjecting my own eyes and ears to that garbage.

Even though kids don’t understand politics, if you sit around and talk trash about the president in front of your child, it WILL be shared in class, I can promise you that! If you openly, God forbid, express your prejudice feelings in front of your child, they WILL share that too. If you listen to YG or Cardi B in the car, they’ll come in singing obscenities without realizing it. I know these things because they DO happen. This is not me telling you what to watch, what to listen to, or how to feel; this is just a teacher telling you that even when you think your child isn’t listening, paying attention, or understanding- they are. They are always listening, always watching, and always repeating the things they hear at home. Please be conscientious of this when you decide to have adult conversations!

LIMIT SCREEN TIME. In a millennial world, everything is electronic. We rely so heavily on different types of screens. It becomes all too easy to just put a child in front of a screen to keep them busy while you accomplish x,y, or z. But those hours add up too quickly. The more time that young brains spend in front of a screen, the less practice they have with human contact. This creates many issues. So many kids have trouble learning how to act, speak, and behave in a group or public setting because of the lack of human interaction they have; they are so used to watching or having relationships through a screen. Studies have shown a correlation between too much screen time and other learning problems, such as speech delays. Screen time also goes hand-in-hand with what kids are viewing and doing. If you aren’t monitoring what your child is doing on a screen, there is a whole different set of problems that can stem from that. Keep it simple- be aware of your child’s screen time and set limits!

I know someone reading is thinking, “she’s not a parent, so she doesn’t know.” You’re right- I’m not a parent, and I don’t know your story. But I am a teacher whose sole purpose is to help children become successful and prepared for life! I see these things on a daily basis. These are simply my observations as a teacher. I am with your children longer than you are some days, and I get to see into their creativity, their learning style, and work ethic, and I get to watch as their personalities bloom and grow. If I do anything as a teacher- I want to lead by example and know that I am doing the best I can to set these students up for an amazing life as functional citizens in our world.